Ephesians 4:2

“Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”

Paul now list some of the characteristics of a life lived in accordance with the calling that we have received in Christ. In this verse, we have some qualities that Christians are supposed to exhibit towards one another, qualities that work positively to building up a community of faith.

humility is an attitude in which we seek to glory in other people rather than ourselves. In Philippians 3:3, Paul exhorts us to “do nothing out of selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourself.”

Humility is the rare ability to assess honestly our own gifts and limitations. CS Lewis used the analogy of a painter who rejoice is in an artwork regardless of whether it was his own or somebody else's .

every christian is a unique creation. We all have different gifts, different willingness to use those gifts, and different ways of expressing those gifts. We are at varying levels of spiritual, emotional, and physical maturity. How can I in any truthful way decide that I am in some way better or more spiritual than another person?

humility is the way of Jesus - a life marked by serving rather than being served.

Paul says we should be gentle.

gentleness is the ability to control strength in such a way as to build people up rather than pulling them apart. A parent is gentle with a baby or young child, because they know that the baby is fragile and will be injured if they throw her or stomp on her.

Gentleness is the ability to see the preciousness of another believer and to moderate our words or actions so as not to cause harm .

there are people who have shared my life for decades, with whom I can be direct and tell them exactly what I think. With other people, I need to be careful to use words that encourage, words that coax strength rather than fear.

in gentleness, I take a mental step out of my body and imagine what my words or actions will do to another person. I am not always good at this, but as gentleness is part of the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22 23), I trust that over time the Holy Spirit is developing this in me.

we are to be patient with other people (or long suffer as older translations put it).

Patience is the ability to wait without anxiety, and to trust that the desired outcome will arrive in its time .

patience is a fruit of faith as we learn that God provides what we need at the right time. In the same way, He develops in people in His time the potential that we might see now.

patience is at odds with our culture in many ways. We are surrounded by devices that do things faster; we can buy fast food or heat up precooked meals in minutes in a microwave; we expect instant communication and rapid responses to our wants.

God requires us to be patient because now is not always the right time.

farmers cannot shorten the time it takes to make a crop - although plant breeders can. Mothers cannot shorten pregnancy .

we always need to recognise that in any collection of believers, some have not been on the journey for as long as we have. Others may face barriers to spiritual growth that we cannot imagine. Others just bloom slowly.

we have to be patient with one another, because God is patient with us.

to bear with one another does not mean that we tolerate them with gritted teeth. Bearing with one another does not mean that we summon enough self-control to not slap that annoying person.

To bear with them means that we recognise their different personalities and quirky ways, and love them regardless.

That person who irritates me with their continual chatter, or that person who is always boasting about their sporting ability, may be the very person who has the ability and time to fix my plumbing problem. They may be the very person that God has sent into my life to teach me love and empathy .

bearing with other people means learning to see and appreciate who they are as a person uniquely created by God and loved by him .

over all of these things comes love. This is agape love, God's perfect love. It is love that makes it possible for the church to exist as the reflection of God's love for the world.

it is because I have experienced the perfect love of God that I can become a channel of love to others and received their love in return.

we can not bear with others or exercise patience, humility, and gentleness unless God's love is at work in us. This is the mystery of the church - that people of diverse abilities, backgrounds, personalities, and interests should be united in one body because of the love of Christ.

Key points in this verse:

• We are to be humble and gentle with one another

• We have to put the needs and the weaknesses of others ahead of our own inclinations

• Humility is the way of Jesus

• We are to be patient with one another and bear with one another

• We cannot hurry up God's work in other people

• Love is the gift from God that enables us to love others, especially those who on the surface a different to us